Content note: mental health stuffs. Not really any triggering content that I know of (heeyyyy progress!!!!)
My day started with me muttering “Fuck” when I woke up at 1050 for an 11am therapist appointment. It’s been a long long time since I’ve done that. So much baggage built into oversleeping.
Old me would have spewed anger everywhere and all over everyone. This time I was a lot calmer. Luckily I had clothes out (thanks last night me) because my room is a damn disaster due to depression.
Wonder Woman drove me. I hate needing help (Self Saving Warrior Princess… remember?) I’m glad she was there to help me. So fucking glad. Can we even discuss how much I was beating myself up on that drive?
Therapy went well. More discussions about PRP vs IOP vs DBT groups (you need a masters in abbreviations to keep up). I left with more numbers to call. We talked about unpacking unnecessary baggage vs just leaving it at the top of the steps (I argued that I would still have to clean it up later).
And then my amazing girlfriend took me on a walk through the park.
Damn exercise. Eww fresh air and nature. Ewwwww holding hands and cute pictures with a super cute girl.
I’m still grumpy and blah, but a little less so. And my brain is a little less of an asshole right now.
This weekend was great with derby stuff and there were still many hard hard hours between when’re I held on and that was all I could do.
Today started off horribly jarring and ick and then was a great walk in the park and a great lunch.
Maybe I can start reversing the ratio of shit moments to good ones?
My brain needs a break.